


Consanguinity

by majesticartax



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-30
Updated: 2016-02-12
Packaged: 2018-05-17 03:53:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5853046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/majesticartax/pseuds/majesticartax
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tragedy strikes and Ciel and Alois must rely on their special brotherly bond to survive the aftermath.</p><p>They have only ever needed each other, anyway.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> ** I HAVE NOT ABANDONED THIS! I know it's been 5ever since I updated but I have so much more to write for these two. The next chapter is mostly written, I've just gotten caught up in my other fics. Thank you so much for reading!!**
> 
> This isn't explicit yet, but the set up is there. It's about eventual incest so...expect an explicit rating when all that goes down.
> 
> Ciel starts off as 8 and Alois is 11. 
> 
> (And Jesus Christ, they aren't having sex that young, so don't worry. I'm perverted but I'm not THAT fucked up.)

**Prologue**

 

“Go get your brother for dinner.”

Alois hummed his assent, tossing his textbook onto the cushion as he rose from the couch, welcoming the homework break and wondering where Ciel had been since he blazed through the front door and stomped up the stairs after school without so much as a ‘hello’.

“Ciel?” Alois called from the landing at the top of the stairs. He turned down the hall and approached his younger brother’s room when his call went unanswered.

“Hey, Ciel, dinner.” He repeated, rapping twice on the cracked door. The door swung inwards as Alois entered; the dark blue of his bedroom walls creating an even darker atmosphere as the last rays of the mid-autumn sun barely leaked through his drawn curtains.

The blond squinted at the bed, struggling to make out a sleeping form as his brother had been quite keen on naps these days. _Cause third grade is so exhausting._ The eleven-year old snickered smugly to himself. However, there was no Ciel napping on the bed after all, and the puzzled male flicked on the light to confirm that he definitely wasn’t in his room.

His brother’s backpack was slung carelessly across his small desk, the contents spilling out haphazardly from the zippered pouch – a rather strange sight considering the meticulous nature of the rest of his bedroom.

With a shrug, Alois turned off the light and closed the door. _Maybe he’s reading in my room again._ He thought – another odd habit the eight-year old had developed lately. It wasn’t unusual to find the male sprawled across Alois’ own bed, reading and nestled into the covers before their bed time. Oddly enough, despite Ciel’s interest in tucking himself into his brother’s bed, he had been strangely distant the past few months, pushing past Alois without saying good night as he left his room, and barely talking to or looking at him at the dinner table.

Last weekend Ciel wouldn’t even leave the bed to go play video games with him. He just grumbled and told Alois to go away as he rolled over and continued reading. Alois reminded him that he was in _his_ bed, and that he could kick him out whenever he wanted to. Ciel practically threw a fit when his brother tugged on the blankets, yelling and throwing pillows until the older male gave up and left the room, slamming the door behind him. 

But despite his cold, distant attitude, nothing seemed to keep Ciel from tiptoeing into his brother's room late at night and snuggling against him until morning.

As the blond turned to check his own room, a muffled sob caught his ears. He spun around and ran down the hall towards the bathroom, his fist halting before banging on the hard wood as ragged whimper rang from beyond the door.

His eyes widened as his hand flew to the knob, panic bubbling in his chest as the latch clicked beneath his fingers as he tugged at the locked door no avail.

“Ciel! Ciel! Are you alright!?” Small fists hammered on the door “Let me in! Are you hurt!?”

“NO!” His brother choked out, “Don’t come in here!”

“Ciel please! Please let me in!” The male called, wrenching on the knob again as his brother began sobbing uncontrollably.

“Go away! Please…” His last plea dissolved into a whisper as Alois stepped back from the door with wide eyes. He turned and sped to his bedroom, remembering when their dad broke into Ciel’s locked room last year when he was having an asthma attack. Just as he was about to break down the door, their mother appeared with a long, thin nail, and they jimmied open the lock just in time to get Ciel to the hospital. Once the danger had passed, his brother had been tearfully reprimanded and forced to promise to never lock doors again, and Alois was entrusted with the life-saving nail thing...whatever it was.

He threw open the door to his bedroom and plucked the tool from its easily accessible location in a pen holder on his desk and ran back down the hall.

“Ciel! Open the door! Please!” He gave one final shout before he slid the nail into the lock, jamming it forward once until a soft click signaled to him to try the knob again.

“STOP!” Ciel shouted just as his brother burst through the door, his sky blue eyes flashing with terror before they landed on the huddled form of the younger male, his small back pressed up against the bathtub with his knees drawn up and his pants pushed down his thighs.

“Ciel…” Alois whispered as he softly shut the door behind him, swallowing thickly as understanding began to slowly wash over him.

“I told you not to come in!” The male sobbed again, burying his wet, flushed face in his hands. “No no NO! Don’t!” He cried in horror. “Don’t come over here!” He jerked his head up and dark eyes flew open as the blond stepped forward, small legs shuffling the male’s body along the side of the tub, socked feet slipping wildly on the tile as Ciel did his best to distance himself from his concerned brother. “Get away!”

“Shh…Ciel…” Alois repeated, crouching down where he stood, careful not to invade his brother’s personal space any more than he already had. “Why are you crying?”

“Because!” The boy cried as he wrapped his arms around his skinny legs. “I’m n-not—I’m not nor-mal!” He choked, lowering his face to his knees.

Pale brows furrowed as the blond struggled to come up with a way to mollify his little brother – to explain what he learned in health class about things like this. “It’s okay.” He whispered as the smaller male shuddered with weighty sobs, his breath catching in his throat as his tiny lungs huffed raggedly. “Everyone does that. It’s normal…you’re normal.” He took the risk of crawling a foot closer. “You didn’t hurt yourself did you?”

“N-no…it felt…i-it…” The boy shook as he fought to take a deep breath, eyes peeking cautiously at his older brother. “B-but…I—I...” His eyes flew open wide in alarm as Alois scooted right up next to him.

“Then why are you crying?” The blond asked, bumping his shoulder affectionately against his brother. “Did someone tell you it isn’t normal?”

Ciel swallowed hard as his chest rose and fell with frightened pants, he swiped at his puffy eyes with the back of his hand, unable to face his brother. “N-no…” His voice cracked. “I—“

“Hey, is everything all right in there?” A loud knock sounded from the door as their father called from the other side. “Your mom is putting dinner on the table now.”

Poor little Ciel turned white as a sheet, his trembling lips parted in a silent plea and he clutched at his brother’s arm with frantic fingers, eyes wild and rimmed with tears as he finally met Alois’ own gaze.

“Yeah,” The blond called with a smile to his brother. “Ciel just has a tummy ache. I’m going to put him to bed and bring him some dinner later. I’ll be down in a second.”

“Oh…alright.” Their dad answered. “You ok, Ciel?”

Alois nodded at the terrified Ciel. “Y-yeah.” He squeaked. “I’ll be f-fine.”

“Aren’t you lucky to have such a caring older brother.” Their dad laughed. “Feel better, kiddo.”

The boys listened as their father’s steps retreated and Ciel let out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Thank you.” He whimpered.

Alois smiled, “Of course, I wouldn—hey!”

The blond laughed as Ciel threw his arms around him and hugged him as hard as he could. The small boy buried his tear-stained face into his brother’s shirt and sniffed loudly.

“Hey! Don’t get snots all over me!” Alois giggled and returned the hug. He felt Ciel relax and laugh into his chest as his death-grip loosened.

“I do not have snots.” Ciel shot back with another sniff and a reluctant smile as he plopped back down next to the bathtub, his face brought back to crimson as he glanced down before pulling his pants up over his hips. “So um…” the younger male stared down at his fidgeting fingers. “Do you? Um…do it too?” He peeped.

“I have…before.” Alois answered, slightly embarrassed. “Except…I hear it’s supposed to get…like, better or something…when you get older? I don’t know.” He finished quickly, turning away with a blush.

Ciel quietly nodded at that and appeared to be thinking hard about something.

“Are you going to tell me why you were crying? Did someone say something mean to you?”

The younger male seemed to stiffen at the question, his eyes darting around the bathroom as he licked his lips. “N-no…not about…that.”

“What then?” Alois pressed, voice thick with concern. “Who is being mean to you?”

“No one really…I just…um…are boys only supposed to marry girls?”

“What?”

Alois frowned, remembering that he asked their mom that very same question after school a couple years ago, after hearing a kid in his class get teased for having two dads. Their mom sat both of them down and explained that some people have two daddies or two mommies, and that they are just the same as everyone who has both a mommy and a daddy, and that people fall in love with other people of the same sex all the time.

“Everyone is free to love whoever they want to.” Were her last words to them on the topic.

“Mom said that boys can marry boys and girls can marry girls, remember?” Alois reminded his brother.

“Um…sorta.” Ciel answered and continued to fidget. “That’s not really…um…what about--”

“What’s wrong, Ciel?”

“Um…” The male dropped his head with a defeated sigh. “We were supposed to write about our future families today…the teacher said I’m a good writer and hung mine up on the board, but then Claude told me that I was gay and that I can’t marry…um…a boy when I grow up.” A tear slipped down his cheek as he looked away. “Lizzy told me that he was just being jealous cause his didn’t get hung up like mine did. But he told me again later that…um…I’m not allowed to…um…that his dad told him that people can’t marry…um…and then even Lizzy said what I wrote was weird, but she wasn’t mean about it…”

Alois smiled and shook his head. “Claude is an _asshole_ ,” He whispered, making the teary Ciel giggle. “You marry whoever you want to when you grow up! Maybe you’ll even marry him!”

“Ew no!” Ciel laughed and shoved at his brother. “He’s got horse teeth! And he smells like cats!”

“He sounds so handsome! Maybe _I’ll_ marry him!” Alois clutched his chest and threw his head back in mock yearning as Ciel started laughing and grabbing at his hands.

“No! No no no! You can’t! He’s gross! Stay with me!” Ciel chortled and threw his arms around his older brother.

“Mmm…fine. I’ll stay with you.” Alois hummed as he gathered the smaller male into a hug. “I don’t like horses anyway.”

“Good.” Ciel huffed indignantly before dropping his head and nuzzling into the crook of the blond’s neck.

The boys sat on the bathroom floor as Ciel gave a few final sniffs, signaling that he had finally calmed down as Alois rocked him gently.

“Do you love me?” Ciel whispered hesitantly.

“Of course I do.”

“How much?”

“More than anything in the world.”

“Will you always be with me?”

“Always.”

“Promise?”

“I promise. No matter what I’ll never, ever leave you.” 

 

And the fire that tore through their house that night would forever solidify that promise as the only beacon of hope for either of them for the rest of their lives.


	2. Chapter 2

"They've been through something terrible. It's natural for them to turn towards one another during this time. They have a lot of healing yet to do, but they will eventually come around.”

“Yes, I understand that, but it’s been almost two years and they—“

“Please, let them heal at their own pace. They don’t have anyone they trust besides each other anymore.”

“Okay, can you please stop talking like we aren’t here?” Alois huffs, folding his arms and kicking his heels against the brown suede couch.

“Alois, be nice. She’s just trying to help.” Ciel whispers as he prys a hand from his brother’s chest, entwining their fingers and leaning against his shoulder as Alois peeks at him out of the corner of his eye.

“See what I mean though?” Their foster mother points at the two of them, “Should they be doing that at their age?”

Ciel feels Alois stiffen under his grasp as his lips curl into a sneer, but their therapist interjects.

“Ciel, honey, how old are you now?”

“I’m ten.” The child states, lifting his chin.

“Hannah, it’s perfectly normal for a boy of ten to want to be close to his brother. As I said, they have been through a tragedy. Their actions towards each other are nothing more than a coping mechanism. Allow them to grieve and they will heal. They need each other now more than ever.”

“What about showering? Baths, even! They insist on being with each other at all times. I think it’s creepy that—“

“Alois, do you let your brother shower with you?”

“Not exactly.”

“Alois!” Hannah scolds, “Don’t lie!”

“I’m not lying, _Hannah_.” The blond snarls. “Dr. Mey,” He turns to face the woman and smiles sweetly. “Ciel likes to read and the sound of the shower helps him relax. He comes in and sits on the floor next to the tub with his books and keeps me company sometimes.”

“ _All_ the time.” Their foster mother corrects.

“Mmhm, I see,” Dr. Mey smiles, “Sounds harmless to me. And do you take baths with Ciel?”

“He likes when I wash his hair. Our mom used to do it…is that a crime?”

“No, of course not sweetie. It sounds like you and your brother love each other very much.”

“We do.” Ciel says with a squeeze to his brother’s hand.

“What about sleeping together?” Hannah frowns.

“Ciel, do you and your brother share a bed?”

“We have separate rooms…but…” Ciel shoots Alois a worried look, to which he nods reassuringly. “I like his bed better. Sometimes I have nightmares…”

The therapist nods and writes something in her notepad. “Did you start sleeping with your brother after the fire?”

“Um—“ The boy flinches when Alois gives his hand a firm, communicative squeeze, “Y-yes. Only after the fire.”

A dark brow raises behind thick glasses. “Are you sure about that, Ciel? You can tell me.”

“Yes! S-sorry.” Ciel rubs at his eye patch with a wavering voice, “My eye just started to hurt. Can I go to the bathroom?” 

“Of course, I’d like to talk to Alois alone for a few minutes – if that’s okay, of course, Mrs. Annafellows.”

“I understand. Ciel, do you need your eye drops?” Hannah asks, rummaging through her purse as Ciel stands and casts a fleeting glace at his brother before heading to the door.

“Yes, please.” He mumbles, stepping out without bothering to wait for his foster mother.

Ciel putters around in the waiting room for a few seconds, mindlessly flicking at one of those baby toys with all the beads and colorful wires that you can only find in doctors’ offices before Hannah emerges.

“Oh, Ciel! Go wash your hands. Those things are filthy.” She chides, holding out the bottle of drops.

A tiny hand snatches the bottle as a single blue eye rolls in its socket.

Ciel meanders down a dim hallway, half-cringing at the kitsch artwork plastered all over the walls.

 _Disgusting._ He thinks. _Mom would never have brought us to such a place._

He nudges open the bathroom door with his shoulder, peering around the corner to make sure he’d have some privacy before stepping into the empty room.

The boy sets the eye drops on the counter and rests his head against his skinny forearms on the sink with a small groan. He pauses there briefly, passively wondering how long until this endless parade of child psychologists will finally end.

It had been 18 months since the fire – one that robbed them of their home and their parents, all of Ciel’s books, all of Alois’ movies and comics, their dog, their family dinners, their frantic breakfasts and battles to get to school on time, and Ciel’s use of his right eye.

And he was sick to death of lying about nightmares.

He wasn’t having them – he never did. The memory haunted him, sure. How could it not?

If he hadn’t been sleeping in Alois’ bed that night, he would probably be dead. His brother was the one who woke him, who wrapped him in the blanket and led them through the flaming hallway. Alois was the one who went after him after he fell through the weakened, smoldering floor into the fiery living room, jumping through the hole after him and dragging him out through the bay window after smashing it with a metal floor lamp.

The glass that tore Ciel’s face was what had ultimately damaged his eye beyond repair, and Alois never stopped blaming himself, no matter how many times Ciel held him as he wept his apologies, whispering into soft blond hair that it wasn’t his fault, that he was alive because of him – that he would always be grateful and that he loved him more than he knew how to say.

He figured the events were pretty straight forward, and it wasn’t like he watched his parents die.

Dreams just weren’t necessary when the memory was still clear.

Alois himself survived the fire with only a broken ankle and third degree burns to his hands, but that hadn’t stopped him from clinging to his brother, releasing him only when the EMTs forcibly pulled his mangled hands from the blanket to treat them, leaving large pieces of melted flesh clinging to the fabric.

They returned to the house only once, four days after the fire. It had apparently started in the kitchen – though the direct cause couldn’t be identified – and spread quickly through the rest of the house. They stared at the charred remains of their parents’ bedroom, which had been directly above the origin of the flames, and quickly filled with smoke before the floor collapsed. Ciel’s bedroom was directly next door, but he wasn’t in it.

Like most nights.

Ciel sighs and raises his head; he slips his fingers under the black string in his hair and tugs the eyepatch off his head, tossing it carelessly onto the counter beside his unneeded drops.

He leans in close to the mirror, his one good eye inspecting the artificial, glass grotesquerie that doctors shoved into his face a year ago, fingers flicking the ugly thing as he clicks his tongue in annoyance.

While the glass eye was something that was supposed to grant him the luxury of not having to wear the patch, Ciel just recoiled at the falseness of his reflection – the unseeing, unmoving orb  tore at the inside of his stomach. He still wore it, for those times when the patch would slip during gym class, or when Lizzy thought she was being funny and would snatch it off his head and run away. Sometimes his foster parents would plead with him to take it off, so he would leave it in his pocket until he was half-way to school before asking Alois to tie it back on.

The eye didn’t work, and he didn’t want to look at it. It just gave him the creeps.

He turns on the taps and mindlessly scrubs at his hands, making sure to take enough time to fool Hannah into thinking that he tended to his old wound.

_Don’t you need an eye for ‘eye drops’?_

After drying his hands, he dons the patch, tying the string into a well-practiced bow before smoothing his slate locks back into place. With one last, defeated sigh, the boy leaves the bathroom to join his guardian in the waiting room.

* * *

 

“Alois, you know Hannah and Thompson only want to help, right?” Dr. Mey says with a sad smile as the blond scowls, studying the garish, racecar track-esque carpet that kids are meant to lose their shit over. Alois just feels irritated by it. _Mom would have thrown up all over this._

“Help what? Not us. If they did they wouldn’t be trying to rip us apart.”

“They aren’t trying to rip you apart. They just aren’t used to brothers showing so much…affection towards one another. They just want to make sure you’re alright. And that Ciel isn’t confused.”

“Confused!?” Alois’ barks. “Our parents burned to death. We lost our home. He’s half blind because of me. What could he be _confused_ about exactly? I’d say that’s pretty easy to understand.”

“I’m sorry, Alois, I didn’t choose my words correctly. When children experience a trauma, and this is especially true for children of Ciel’s age at the time of the fire, they start having trouble seeing the world as a safe place and trusting others. Sometimes they have problems making decisions for themselves, and might feel paranoid a lot of the time. You were a little bit older, so you might have…an easier time dealing with certain things, though I know there isn’t anything ‘easy’ about what you have gone through.”

Alois snorts.

“This is still a very difficult time for both of you, and I know you still need each other. So I’m going to ask you to describe your relationship with your brother, will you do that for me?”

The blond lets out a slow, fuming exhale as a thin leg bounces in irritation. “I don’t have to do anything.” He mutters, sick to death of this same song and dance and feeling particularly disobedient today.

“No, that’s right,” The therapist says softly with a smile, “I’m not going to force you to do anything you don’t want to.”

Alois scoffs – somehow that answer made him even angrier; but he suddenly remembers his brother’s hand sliding into his own, his quiet voice reminding him that the doctor was just here to help…after all, she repeatedly informed Hannah that their relationship was nothing to be concerned about.

Even though he knew Ciel’s words to him were just an act, it still reminded him to remember their routine…even if Ciel was way better at it than he was.

The past year had been filled with appointments – child psychologists, counselors, psychiatrists, even a hypnotist. Hannah was determined to find a professional who shared her opinion, that Ciel and Alois did not share a ‘normal’ relationship. But each new appointment yielded similar results: “They are healing. They are normal. They need each other. It will pass.”

He raises his eyes with a sigh, plopping his thin arms down onto the couch. “We…” He begins quietly. “Ciel really doesn’t trust many people. He’s different from other boys his age…he’s changed a lot this past year.

“In what way?”

“It’s like…it’s like he’s aged ten years over night. But he’s still so…”

“It may seem that way, but you know that’s not actually the case, right?”

“Of course I know that,” Alois snaps, “I’m not stupid.”

“I know you aren’t stupid, Alois.”

He sighs, “Sorry. Ciel is…he’s so smart. He’s always reading…but as smart as he is, he still doesn’t…understand a lot of…things.”

“Well he’s still a ten year old boy, there’s going to be a lot he won’t understand for quite a while,” Dr. Mey jots down a note, “Is there anything specific you wished he understood?”

Sky blue eyes widen. _That’s new._ “Um…” He fidgets with the strings on his hoodie, dropping his gaze to his lap. “I don’t know.” He whispers.

The room fills with the sound of pen-on-paper as Dr. Mey scrawls her notes with a smile.

 _Just end this._ “Doctor...we just don’t have anyone else. We lost everything.”

“I know your brother is very special to you,” The therapist replies, looking up from her notepad, “And I’m not going to tell Hannah that there is any cause for concern.”

She writes one final note before removing her glasses, setting them on her knee and leaning forward, suddenly pinning him with a very serious look.

Alois recoils instinctually, pressing his back into the cushions and turning his head slightly.

“Just tell me one thing, Alois. And I promise, no matter what your answer is I won’t recommend you or your brother be moved to another home. I don’t want to see you two separated. I just need you to be honest with me.”

The blond licks his lips, his hands sweating and heart rate suddenly accelerating at the seriousness of her tone.

“Do you and Ciel ever touch each other? And I don’t mean hugging or kissing like family members do. I know you’re old enough to understand what I’m asking.”

Alois swallows.

_That’s new too._

But he knows the answer to this question well. A little too well. And he doesn’t have to lie.

 No, no they don’t touch each other. Not like that.

He knows he can’t allow it.

“No.” He states clearly, returning her weighty stare.

“Alright then.” She says, resuming her sterling smile and replacing her glasses. “I think that’s enough for today. Thank you Alois. I’ll meet you and your brother out front in a few minutes to schedule another appointment.”

Without a word, the blond jumps up and flees the office as fast as his skinny legs can carry him.

* * *

 

 “Why do I have to go by myself next time?” Ciel grumbles from the back seat of Hannah’s fancy sedan on their way back to the house.

“Dr. Mey wants to do some one on one work with you, just to make sure you’re doing alright in school and things like that.” Their guardian smiles into the rearview mirror.

“You know I’m doing well in school. You don’t need to see a doctor to tell you that. What a sham.”

“Where do you learn these words?” She laughs at the disgruntled Ciel.

“How sad for you – impressed by a four letter word.” He mutters under his breath as he lays his head into Alois’ lap, his brother laughing at his smarminess and tearing his attention from the view of the identical houses of the suburbs as they speed by. He drops his hand into Ciel’s hair, combing dark locks away from his face, careful not to disturb the silk patch as the younger male sighs with appreciation.

The car is quiet the last ten minutes of their drive as Alois pets Ciel’s head, distractedly chewing on the inside of his cheek with a dull ache crawling in his stomach.

The moment the car stills inside the garage the boys jump out, the smaller male leading the way up the stairs to Alois’ bedroom and quickly shutting the door quietly behind them.

Ciel groans dramatically and flops face first onto Alois’ bed, twisting his tiny hands into the comforter and screaming into the pillow before the blond sinks down into the mattress beside him.

“When is this going to stop?” Ciel mumbles into the fabric, “I’m sick of it.”

 Alois worries his bottom lip, thinking back to the final moments with the psychologist and wondering if Ciel had ever been the recipient of such a question.

“Ciel…have the doctors ever asked you…” He tapers off with a wince, regretting that he even began to ask the question.

“Hm?” Ciel’s little face peeks out, flushed from pressing into the pillow and eye patch endearingly askew, “Ask me what?”

“Never mind, I forgot.” Alois smiles at his disheveled brother.

The boy turns over onto his back and extends his skinny arms, curling small digits inwards and flicking them out again in a beckoning motion.

Alois crawls over to Ciel, smile breaking into a full on grin as he reaches out to adjust the eyepatch before snuggling up next to the smaller boy, Ciel’s frail arms encircling him in a tight hug.

Ciel rolls them over and scoots on top of Alois, pressing the side of his face into his dark blue hoodie. Tiny thighs flank a slender abdomen as the boy shimmies around and gets comfortable.

“I can hear your heart beating,” Ciel murmurs listlessly before yawning, “Mmnn…so warm.” He hugs Alois tighter and wiggles his skinny hips.

Alois continues to stroke dark locks as Ciel’s breath begins to even out, and breathy little sounds of sleep escape full, parted lips.

The older male pops an arm beneath his head and stares at the ceiling, brows slanting in concern as he begins to face the possibility that Dr. Mey’s final question would not be in isolation, especially since he turned thirteen, and definitely not if Hannah continues to refer to their relationship as…oh how did she so lovingly put it? Ah yes – creepy.

 _Stupid Meddling bitch_. He thinks coldly. Sky blue eyes flutter closed as Alois allows his brother’s gentle breathing to soothe him, to lull him into contented relaxation.

As long as Ciel is with him, nothing else matters.

The two males doze peacefully in the late afternoon of a dreary Spring Saturday, undisturbed by the world, safe and warm in each other’s arms.

* * *

 

Alois cracks his eyes in the darkening room as Ciel begins to stir from his nap, mumbling quietly and incoherently as he wakes. The older male drops his hands to his brother’s back, massaging the skin lightly over a delicate ribcage and drawing angelic little hums of pleasure from murmuring lips.

Ciel yawns and nudges his way under his brother’s chin, wrapping his arms around his shoulders and nuzzling affectionately into the warm crook of his neck, sighing contently and shutting his eye once more.

A smile spreads across the blond’s face when soft lips press against the hollow of his throat.

“Hey that tickles.” Alois giggles as Ciel begins to nibble at the skin, dark hair fluttering beneath his chin.

The younger boy just purrs against the warm flesh as Alois strokes his back, his fingers hitching up the t-shirt before running the pads along the bumps of his spine.

Skinny arms hold slender shoulders tighter as a pink tongue flicks out against the skin. “Mmnn – you taste good.” Ciel whispers before suckling gently on the flesh.

 Lungs release a slow breath as Alois rolls his head slightly to the side as Ciel continues to taste him, the teen holding the small body against his chest as his eyes slide shut.

 Lying there sleepily, Alois enjoys the sensation of his brother’s lips on him the way he always does; even though Ciel had never really sucked on his neck like this before – it was a pleasant, welcomed feeling.

“That feels nice.” The male mumbles before Ciel picks his head up, a pleased smirk plastered on his face.

“Good.”

Ciel goes back to work sucking and lapping at the skin, satisfied with the light salty taste and the vibrations of bliss emanating from his brother’s throat.

“What are you doing, exactly?”

Tiny shoulders shrug.

“Did you read about something like this?”

Ciel shrugs again.

Pink lips nibble up to the edge of blond hair behind Alois’ ear as the male tips his head further, exposing more of his neck for Ciel’s taking.

With a deep inhale, Alois slides his palm flush against his brother’s skin, pressing Ciel closer as the older male arches his back.

A sudden moan catches in the teen’s throat and sky blue eyes fly wide with terrified realization.

_That feels too good._

Alois’ eyes dart around the room as his breath hitches and his hands fly to grip the boy’s waist.

“Hey Ciel,” He keeps his voice low to hide the waver, “Cut it out now.”

“Mmm-no. I like it.” He replies, thighs squeezing around his brother’s middle as he starts nipping at his collar bone.

 “Come on,” Panic starts to rise in the teen’s chest as he squirms, a heel digging into the mattress. “I have to…um…pee.”

“Liar.” Ciel whispers before biting into the supple flesh over his brother’s accelerating pulse.

A groan of pleasure tears unbidden through Alois’ throat as his eyes flutter shut again and the tips of his thin fingers squeeze firmly into a tiny waist.

“Ciel…you—you don’t know what you’re doing,” He whimpers. “P-please stop. You can’t do that—a-ah—“

The teen presses his hips back into the mattress, knees bending as both feet plant against the comforter.

“I know what I’m doing,” Ciel halts his misdeeds and lays his cheek against his brother’s shoulder, dark brows crinkling with confusion as the older male breathes a shaky sigh of relief. “I’m making you feel good.”

Alois inhales a long, slow, stabilizing breath. “You just can’t do things like that, okay? Hannah doesn’t even like us sleeping with each other. What do you think she would do if she saw you doing that?”

Ciel huffs indignantly and sits up, pressing his hands against his brother’s chest and peering down at him with a scowl. “Hannah can’t see us. Why can’t I do what I want?”

“I don’t want them to take you away…you just have to be careful.” Alois pleads, his heart still beating rapidly at the feeling of his brother sitting on top of him.

“Fine.” The boy drops back down, kissing lightly down side of his brother’s face to whisper in his ear. “Then let me do it now when she isn’t here. It feels good, right?”

Alois shivers at the feeling of the younger male’s breath in his ear, his digits twisting into the fabric at the back of his shirt as Ciel resumes nibbling at his neck.

“Stop…please s-stop.” He mewls breathlessly, blue eyes screwing shut.

“Why should I? You like this.” Ciel hums against the moist skin before biting emphatically in protest, his own fingers clutching at the front of the blond’s hoodie.

“Ciel! You—ah!” He cries, desperation quickly rising as his brother begins to suck greedily on his throat. Alois breathes heavily, erratic huffs fleeing his parted lips as his tongue darts out to wet the dry skin; his throat bobbing beneath his brother’s mouth as he swallows hard.

“C-ciel. Stop.” The teen says more forcefully, moving his hands to press against Ciel’s shoulders.

The boy growls and tightens his hold, sucking hard on the skin and sinking his teeth in deeply, lapping and tugging at the flesh as his brother shudders and squirms.

“I said STOP!” Alois finally summons the strength to shove the small body from him roughly; thin limbs flail as Ciel tumbles off the side of the bed with a yelp and a quiet thud.

The teen breathes harshly and rakes his hands down his crimson face in distress as Ciel rights himself on the carpeted floor, propping himself up on his tiny elbows and glaring daggers at his brother, a mix of hurt and confusion alight in his single blue eye.

“Why—“ The teen’s voice cracks, the word inaudible as he sits up abruptly and jumps off the bed, stalking quickly to the door before whipping around and pinning his brother with a tortured gaze.

“Why are you so smart but still so stupid?”

He wrenches open the door, two tears slipping down his cheeks as he staggers on quivering legs towards the bathroom.


	3. Chapter 3

A thin leg dangles from the edge of a mattress and the other is bent, propping up the laptop as Alois stares vacantly at the screen, his upper body slouched against the headboard with a few pillows and the back of his head resting on a thin arm. 

He gnaws on his lip and occasionally swipes at his eyes with the cuff of his sleeve, the bright blue irises still rimmed with an itching red from earlier.

Aching eyes blink into the darkness, past the bright screen to squint at the digital clock on his dresser, the angry red numbers displaying 10:48pm only serve to exacerbate the sinking feeling in his chest.

With a sigh, he flicks his gaze back to whatever stupid movie he threw on to distract him from his grumbling stomach.

Among other things.

It wasn’t unusual for either brother to skip dinner; Hannah was a vegetarian, which by default made the rest of them dinner-time vegetarians – she also couldn’t cook for shit. Alois often wondered why they didn’t just hire a cook or a housekeeper to tend to such things, they were well above their means to do so – though maybe it was a point of pride.

The Annafellows’ home was a sprawling, three-story Victorian design, with too many doors and far too much unoccupied space, amidst a smattering of typical, boxy suburban houses of similar style. The gated neighborhood was yet in its infancy, and the recently planted trees still weren’t even tall enough to climb. That is, however, everywhere except their yard. Hannah was an actress and Thompson was a sixth generation lawyer, so it wasn’t difficult for him to convince the town board to declare his family home as a city land-mark – some Duke or Prince or some kind of important guy once stayed in one of the guest rooms. Whatever. No one cares.

So as the surrounding acres were revised and regrown, the old house remained safe where it stood.

Alois supposed the massive house was the main reason the married pair got into the foster care business – their need to fill the empty rooms.

What humanitarians.

On a typical night, when one of the brothers would go without dinner, Ciel would sneak down the two flights of creaky wooden stairs into the kitchen and rummage for cookies and candy that were kept on hand for “special occasions”, tiptoeing soundlessly back up into his older brother’s room to victoriously present the night’s spoils with a proud grin.

The boys would feast on sugary treats and watch old horror movies; Ciel would always poke fun at the predictable plot lines with his sharp tongue and sharper wit, and would imitate the cheesy acting just to see Alois laugh, but he would be just as ready to shamelessly jump into the older’s lap or burrow under the covers during a particularly scary part. They would fall asleep in a pile of pillows and blankets on the floor or snuggled into the teen’s bed with Alois’ arms wrapped around Ciel’s smaller body, keeping him warm and safe from the world.                             

But not tonight.

Ciel’s door was shut tight when Alois finally emerged from the bathroom, his face flushed from crying following the incident in his bedroom.

He stilled beside the large door – a monolith of regret – lingering for a moment with the ache of guilt heavy in his stomach as he sniffed and knuckled his red, puffy eyes; he raised his hand and parted his lips to speak, inhaling sharply and raggedly as he moved to knock, but instead he dropped his hand and hung his head in self-defeat.

_How do I even explain something like that._

He shuffled back down the hallway, his hand gripping at his aching chest as he shut the his door softly, wincing at the soft click as he turned the lock, a deafening boom in his ears.

Standing motionless in his dark bedroom, the blond’s eyes graced over the rumpled comforter and traveled down to the floor where Ciel had fallen – where he had thrown him.

In all of their ten years together, never once had Alois ever raised a hand to his brother. Never had he tormented or cruelly teased him like he knew he was expected to as an older brother; never once had he wanted him to feel discomfort or pain at his own hand.

He never understood how his friends were able to treat their little siblings so unkindly, how they were able to look into those sweet, glittering eyes – ones that always shown with such hope, such admiration and trust – and say awful things, laughing when tears would trickle down their blushing cheeks after being told that they weren’t welcome. The heartbreak on their small, dejected faces tore at him deeply and he usually found himself running back home to eagerly greet his own little brother with a warm hug and an affectionate kiss to his forehead.

Why would ever you want to hurt someone you love?

And now the look of hurt that crossed that sweet, loving face before he fled his bedroom, leaving poor, confused little Ciel alone on the floor, was permanently etched into his mind

Alois exhales through his nose and slams his laptop shut in disgust before throwing his arm over his eyes.

_I’m the worst. I’m the worst older brother in the world. What am I supposed to do? What can I say? ‘Oh sorry, Ciel, you really turned me on so I figured I should throw you on the floor’._

He lays there in aggressive self-loathing, berating himself as he wonders just how he’s supposed to face his brother after that when a small tapping sound meets his ears.

Wiping his eyes again and rolling his head on the pillow toward the source of the noise, he strains to hear it again, but decides that it’s only his imagination as the sound does not present itself again. Oh, how he wished Ciel would come sneaking through the door as if nothing every happened.

_Wishful thinking, I guess. But I can’t see him tonight anyw—_

“Alois?” A quiet voice calls through the door.

Breath catches in the blond’s lungs as his eyes fly wide.

“Alois?” The small voice repeats with a detectable waver, “Can I come in? Please? A-are you awake?”

Alois squeezes his eyes shut and shakes his head, his heart hammering with anxious guilt. A whimper slips through the door.

“Alois…Alois please,” He hears his brother begin to cry, “What did I do wrong? Why are you mad at me?”

The blond’s heart shatters completely; he exhales a quaking breath and shoves the back of his hand over his mouth, his other hand gripping at his hair in anguish.

_Please forgive me Ciel. Please. You’d understand if you knew…if you knew why I can’t let you in._

“Why are you mad at me…why? I’m sorry…I don’t know what I did wrong…”

His resolve is slipping. He wants nothing more than to throw open the door and gather his tearful little brother into his arms, whisper his apologies to him and stroke his hair while he clings to him, nestling against each other in his bed, sharing warmth as he promises never to do something like that again.

He wants to kiss those tiny trembling fingers as Ciel finally calms and sighs with happiness before he wraps his skinny arms around the older’s waist, burying his face into his shirt and giggling at their silly fight. He wants Ciel to dare to kiss his neck again, hesitant at first but emboldened by the reactions he earns, knowing full well that Alois loves the feel of those warm lips on his skin – though still too naïve to know the reason.

He wants Ciel to feel his heart racing beneath his delicate fingers, and to be without the fortitude to admit to it when his brother asks him why with a soft, innocent voice, sitting up and looking at him with loving concern.

‘Are you okay?’ Ciel would ask, ‘Your heart…’

‘I’m fine, just don’t stop,’ he would whisper as a shaking hand cupped his brother’s smooth cheek, ‘It’s because of you.’ He would say as his hand slipped to the back of Ciel’s neck, pulling him down gently, slowly, a hesitant question hanging on his brother’s full lips as they part, though a brazen understanding and desire reflected in his eye…

_NO._

Alois slams his fist in frightened anger into the bed beside him, his chest rising and falling rapidly  as the horrifying reality begins to unfold with crystal clarity within his foggy mind.

“Please…Alois…I’m so—I’m so lonely…Alo-is, please…”

Tears begin to spill freely and silently down Alois’ face as he breaks apart at the sound of his brother’s desperate pleas, every part of his body aching with grief and disgust for himself.

“Don’t hate me Alois, please—please tell me why you’re mad…”

The male swallows hard and musters every last ounce of strength to prevent himself from running to the door; instead he pulls a pillow over his face and finally begins to weep openly for his brother.

Though mostly for himself.

“Alois…” Ciel whimpers one last time as the blond hears his tiny body slide down the door to rest on the carpet.

For several minutes, the only sound in the teen’s room are his own sniffling cries muffled by the pillow. With a shuddering exhale he hesitantly pulls it from his face and strains his ears for evidence of his brother still outside the door, but he is only met with silence.

He breathes a small, quivering sigh of mild relief, glad that Ciel is likely tucked back into his own bed and safe from the pain of brotherly betrayal – at least until morning.

A feverish doze descends on him; he jars repeatedly in his restlessness, legs twitching and groans of distress leaving his lips before another muffled voice sounds through the door.

“Ciel, buddy, what’s wrong?”

He jolts awake, his heart rate instantly accelerating at the sound of Thompson’s low, sleepy voice. Confused and startled, he listens closely for a response.

“Ciel? Hey, what’s going on?” The man repeats.

“Mmnn…go away.” The teen hears a small voice mumble.

Heartbroken understanding washes over him as he realizes that his brother fell asleep outside his door. Light brows furrow as he rolls onto his side, drawing his knees up to his chest and tucking his head down to quell the ache of guilt coursing through his body as he listens helplessly, struggling to swallow the painful lump rising in his throat.

“Hey, come on now. Let’s get you to bed.”

“No! Let me stay here!”

“Ciel, you can’t sleep in the hallway all night. Come on. Did you and Alois have a fight?”

“I’m staying here! Go away!” His small voice rises to a desperate pitch.

Alois covers his ears with his hands but it’s no use. He’d hear the voice in his head anyway.

“Come on—hey, Ciel, stop—“

“No! Put me down! Alois! Alois!” Ciel cries as he is carried through the hall.

“Stop kicking! Ciel! You’re being ridiculous!” Thompson scolds, his voice becoming softer as they travel down the hall and around the corner to the room next door.

A bed creaks on the other side of the wall as Ciel is placed gently within, the murmuring hushes of Thompson attempting to soothe the inconsolable boy remain unintelligible to Alois from his own room as the male rolls onto his other side to face the blank, dark wall that they share.

“A—alo—is…” Ciel struggles to call for his brother, but all he can manage to do is gasp and choke on his own whimpering sobs as the door shuts with a soft click.

As he listens to his brother cry softly, Alois presses his hand to the barrier between them, gently running the pads of his scarred fingers over the slight dimpling of the paint, caressing his brother’s cheek in his mind and wiping away his tears.

“I’m so sorry Ciel…” He whispers to himself as fresh tears slip from his eyes, “I love you.”

Ciel’s cries quiet well into the morning hours, and Alois finally surrenders his exhausted, regret-filled body to the cold embrace of a troubled sleep.

Hugging his pillow tightly to his chest, he falls into restless dreams with tears in his eyes and his brother’s name on his bitten lips.

And the painful realization that everything was about to change. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No sex yet. 
> 
> YET.
> 
> Guaranteed "happenings" within the next two chapters, though.


End file.
